Saturday, December 27, 2008

Prepare my heart

Warning to everyone

This warning is from a forward in my email, and I think it is very important for everyone to realise about this "criminal's trick".

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Dear All,

I am sending this out to alert everybody regarding this incident that happened to me last Saturday when I was in Mid Valley. Just beware, it happened to me & might happen to you or your family members as well...

I was in Mid Valley making my way to Coffee Bean to meet my friend there. There was this Indian guy, aged around 30, well dressed & looked Decent, coming my way right in front of Body Shop & greeted me, 'Hai, Miss , you look happy but recently you have been working too hard... probably you should stop pushing yourself too much & relax a bit..'

Usually, I will brush him off thinking that he is 'chi sin' - crazy. But that day, unusually, I stopped & listened to him,allowing him to continue with his lines for about a minute.

Somehow or rather, fortunately I suddenly felt that something was not right & immediately turned back & moved away from the spot. When I had made my way to Coffee Bean,after sitting down for a few minutes, I felt very dizzy & sleepy.

It took me about half an hour to recover while sitting there. Then, I recalled this Indian guy had a strong fragrant smell while he was talking to me. I do not know how he did it but I was nearly trapped.

Something similar happened to one of my friends in KLIA before but I never expected it to happen in a busy place like Mid Valley. Maybe our mothers are right, do not talk to strangers but they forget to tell us, NOT TO EVEN LISTEN TO STRANGERS.
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Saturday Family Fellowship

Today we had our last family fellowship of the year at brother Eddie and sister Celina home. The fellowship is great and thank God that many brothers and sisters want to share this time. Haha... I want to thank God that Tung Lieng is able to join us as well, hehe...

Brother Eddie shared from Luke 9:57-62 about the cost of following Christ. We know that there is no "free lunch" in the world, i.e. for every benefit we want, we need to pay a price for it. This is the same for salvation, except that Jesus Christ has paid the great price for us. However, to follow Christ way, we need to carry our own cross daily to walk His way. That's exactly right because if we still hold on to the earthly matters, we won't be walking our Lord's way. It is very easy to say "Lord, I will follow you wherever you go", just like the person in verse 57-58. However, are we really know what does it mean by following Christ? When hardship comes, are we still willing to follow our Lord?

Just like Peter told Jesus Christ that "wherever you go, I will follow", but when Jesus Christ had been captured by the guards, he hid away, not dare to admit that he is one of Christ's disciple. To follow Christ, we really need to prepare our heart, clear all earthly things from it so that our Lord Jesus Christ can sit on the throne of our heart. Only then you will have peace, because you know who is in control of everything, and this "someone" wants to give you the best. How fortunate are the saints... we know that we are living on earth for Christ, even when we leave the world, we know where we will be going - going to be with our God the father.

Brother Hock Lee also shared with us about active and passive way of following the Lord. Our Lord wants us to be active to follow His way. Hehe...

Prepare my heart

"Am I ready for baptism? Are my heart ready to serve my Lord wholeheartedly?" these are the questions that I have for the past few months. I know I don't have to be baptise to be saved, but it is a sign of telling the whole world, including my family that "I am serious in following my Lord Jesus Christ!" I want to make my testimony clear to my dad, and I really pray that one day, God will open his eyes and heart, let him see that he is a sinner and there is only this One and Only God who can save him.

I want my dad to know... he doesn't have to care about other gods, because they are all fake god, they can't talk, can't eat, can't move, can't breathe and can't do anything and everything! Paying respect to them? What for I pay respect to a wood? If one think wood is not a very good word for those fake god, then I would say they are just mere art, or art on the pottery, (like china vase)

Many people thought Christianity is a religion, among the Buddhism, Hinduism, Catholic, etc... then if you say you are a Christian, some will ask what denomination your church is... to me, it is as if "Christianity is not a unite group, but fighting against each other, that's why there are so many denomination, so what group is your church in?" It is as if nothing wrong to have a religion of my own... hmm why I don't just create a denomination? Many people also thought that religion is just something people held to "believe" in... to seek comfort (or lying to oneself?) or just to promote good works, can reduce crime and so on...

No, they are all wrong... Christianity is not a religion... it is the truth. In John 14:6, Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father (the One and Only God) except through me. There you have it... only our Lord Jesus Christ dare to make that statement because he really is... let's see if there's such line in other "scripts" where other god write their words. Moreover, bible is the only book that has existed for more than 2000 years, never change, because it is God's words... since God is the same in the past, present and future, His words will never change.

Sunday School day

That's tomorrow... and that will be my first time attending this event, hehe... looking forward for it!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Personal Testimony

Speak your own personal testimony

Haha, we are all ought to remember and able to speak our own personal testimony for our Lord God. It is our own experience and we have to know how our Lord God has changed our lifes. My life changes once my Lord God brought me to an unfamiliar place on my own (well, I am not on my own. Tung Ngie is with me.). My Lord God let me realise how I need Him so much. There was once I had fallen away from my Lord God, but He got me back eventually through much encouragements from my Sunday School teacher then.

Old life

I spent my childhood and teens in a town in Brunei, called Kuala Belait. It is a quiet town, not suitable for those who likes night life. Every family has an average of 2 cars. The town is at the Brunei-Malaysia border, by crossing two bridges we will reach a town in Sarawak, called Miri. Thus, every weekends, you can imagine that there's a huge load of cars going to Miri in the morning, then returning back in the evening, before the immigration stations closed. That's basically KB! Haha...

My dad is not a Christian, but my mum is. I thank my Lord God that my dad didn't stop my mum to bring us to a church in KB. I have three siblings - Tung Ngie (twin brother), Tung Lieng (young brother) and Tung Ci (young sister). There are 5 years gap between Tung Lieng and me (and Tung Ngie), while Tung Ci is 11 years younger than me. Although I did go to church and learnt about our Lord God's merciful, kindness, faithfulness and forgiveness, I still did what I usually do at home - bully my brothers (my sister weren't born yet).

I didn't like to go to school, but have to. When I went to school, I didn't like to go home... I remember once I said "This home again, everytime I came back, it is the same home!" I consider myself as the unlucky one because from young I was diagnosed with hypothyroid, thus need to eat medicine every morning, take blood test, go appointment every four times in a year (varies as the appointments are set by the doctor). Looking at my brothers, who don't have to eat medicine everyday, take blood test and don't have to visit the hospital, I envy them. I bully my brothers a lot, sometime I hate them as well due to my jealousy, especially towards Tung Ngie who always do better than me in everything.

In 1999, Tung Ngie received a scholarship to study in Singapore. Not long after he started school, my father sent me out to Singapore to study too (to accompany Tung Ngie as well). I was studying in a neighbourhood school, near to the school Tung Ngie was studying. Tung Ngie was studying in one of the "top 30" secondary schools in Singapore, thus in order to get in, I need to pass a IQ test... eventually I failed.

That was the first time both of us left our family. How we had missed home then... and how much tears we shed every night... we felt we had been outcasted by our family... no longer live in my own house, no longer able to taste my grandma's food, no longer can see my family everyday, that I have taken them for granted. At that time I really want to take back my word "This home again, everytime I came back, it is the same home!". It is a sad depart for my family as well. Every night then I remembered my mum's tears.

During the course of the study in Singapore, we joined a church in Singapore - The 'Fishermen of Christ' Fellowship. We lived in Raffles Institution Boarding School in Bishan, the church we went is located at Geylang. We would take MRT from Bishan to City Hall interchange to change train to Aljunied. Soon, we felt "lazy" to go to church. Thus we skip going to church when we had activities on Sunday morning with our friends. Eventually, we skipped for more than half year!

My worst experience

Every Saturday night, our Sunday School teacher, brother Anson would call us, ask whether we are coming on Sunday, and our prayer needs. He called us no matter whether we came the last Sunday morning or not. He even continue to call us during the half year we skip going to church. We asked our friend to take the call for us, lied to brother Anson that we were out.

During the half year when we skipped church, every Sunday morning, we would be sleeping late or just waste our time. I felt a sense of remorse, lonely (even when I am participating in an activity with my friends), weak and not much mentality to study as well... it was the worst experience of my life then. As our GCE O'Level were less than half a year away, my heart pounded very fast but weak, I fear that I will fail my subjects, especially English!

Looks like Tung Ngie felt the same way as me, because once we can't take it anymore. Instead of asking my friend to help us to lie to brother Anson, we went to take the phone ourselves. Yes, after a half year long, we finally heard brother Anson's voice over the phone. We told him that we don't want to go to church anymore and ask if he can stop calling us (for his call made us felt the remorse that we had actually lied to him for half year long)...

I thank God that He has not given us up... He equipped brother Anson with His word... through brother Anson's encouraging words over the phone, I saw how wrong I am to skip going to church... knowing the fact that "God is our strength" in my brain, I didn't realise that I can seek the strength from God to overcome my laziness.

After putting down the phone, Tung Ngie and I decided to go back to church the next day... and ask God for forgiveness that night. From then on, I saw the light of God. No longer I feel remorseful, but joy, as if I have set free from jail. On Sunday morning, truly, we went to church and our brother Anson gives us more encouraging words from the bible, from God Himself.

New life

After knowing Christ, I don't feel my heart pounding fast and weak for the incoming GCE O'Level for I have entrust it to my Lord God. From that point of time, I realise how God love me for putting me in a neighbourhood school, so that I won't feel very stressed out. He know my capability more than I do myself for He is the Lord of all! When I look back at my life from God's point of view, I realize that all are in God's plan, including both of us coming out to Singapore, leaving our family, leaving our casual life in KB, let me realize that I have taken all those for granted... truly, I went back to KB for holiday with a different heart... one that really let my Lord God sit on the throne of my heart, not only on the brain. Haha...

I don't feel any grudges toward my brothers anymore, and I don't feel jealous for Tung Ngie's better result... for all these will come to past, and only the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ matters to me now. Philippians 1:21 says that "For to me (Apostle Paul), to live is Christ and to die is gain." I really thank God for this trueful experience... and only He can bring me back. I thank God that I can feel the remorse and fear when I skip going to church, it is the work of Holy Spirit.

Conclusion

If you are experiencing this same experience - skip going to church - hopefully you can take my personal testimony as your way out - come back to the Lord once again! Repent for our Lord God is a merciful God. 1 John 1:9 states "If we confess our sins, he (God) is faithful and just and will forgive us (we all) our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." What are you waiting for? Come back to the Lord to draw strength, so that you can overcome your laziness! Why do you want to live in a remorseful life (life away from the source of life)? Nothing is better than returning to my Lord God, the One and Only Creator.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Busy busy busy

Always hope for the opposite

When I am busy, I always want to be free... when I am free, I always want to find something to do. Haha... that's human heart, never satisfy. However, I am in the former state (the busy state). Haha... I thank God that I manage to complete some of my pending tasks today, still have some more for the week and I have one day left for the week. Very busy... can't wait to get the project over with. Cracking my brains on the WCF, Webservice, EnterpriseLibrary, what the?? Haha... I know those are new technologies, but I have never got myself comfortable with them yet, but I need to work with them in order to complete my tasks.

Speaking of writing unit test for my codes, I have not yet start writing although I know how to write. I want to write a good unit test, but sometimes it is just so hard, because time is not on your side... and your boss thinks everything can be done with a snap of fingers... come on, I have been cracking my brain so hard, thinking what is a better way to implement my codes (so that I can copy and paste faster)... ensuring no compilation error and trying to fit to the current implementation as well... click this and click that, waste most of my time looking for the "right" codes to copy and paste... and then do some refactoring (I need to rename manually for some parts)... then "I thought you said you can finish 'these' this week." ... -.-" duh, this week not yet end... I still got another day (well, the boss' quite right... how could I possibly finish 'these' in a day?) haha... sure is busy busy busy...

Looking forward

Haha... there are somethings that I am looking forward to, i.e. Dec 24-26 (holiday), Dec 28 (Sunday School day), End of March (End of my current project) and June 11-14 (Gospel Camp). These are some "known" events... some unknown "looking forward" events - > New House; > Return to KB; > Finish my tuition grant bond; > New church location. Of course, all these are in God's hand as He knows what's the best for the church.

Project 0812 Debrief

Hey, I am still keeping the email - gameoflife1208@hotmail.com Hehe... hmm thinking how come I write 1208 instead of 0812. Hmm there must be a reason... haha... oh ya... will have a debrief on this coming Saturday with the committee to reflect what we have learnt from organising this event... this makes me see that I have a lot a lot to learn... I think I took things too lightly, didn't consider the severity of my actions and decisions. I am not a quick-make-decision type of guy (thus you know why I have so many pending tasks - I have been talking about it for the last few posts - I keep on thinking about the advantages and disadvantages of the possible ways).

I think the true reason is that I lose my focus on the objective of the event... I forget that the true purpose of this outreach event is to spread the gospel and I got carried away by my mental image - "You are tired!" or "You have never make a correct decision"...

I thank God that He has been telling me to come back to Him with the lessons that I learn from the Sunday School - Apostle Paul reminded us to look forward, don't look behind - reminding me not to look back at all my poor decisions that I have made before thus causing me to fear for making decisions that are coming at me. In fact, we have repeated this lesson during our Sunday School. All in all, I thank God that He provided His own workers! I remember from George Muller's testimony that when his orphanage is in need of money, he didn't even ask from the church, or any brothers and sisters... he just keep praying to God... and God provided His own workers and provide his orphanages' financial needs. I saw God's hand at work as three brothers and sisters are willing to share their testimony during the outreach event, and two sisters willing to join us as counsellors.

I thank God that we have enough food, and God has blessed us with the drinks as well. Hehe.... most importantly, I thank God that He continues to encourage us by telling us not to lose heart, and do not use the attendance or the number of converts to rate our effort. As long as we do our part, God will do His. Let us gather treasure in the heaven, not on earth.

Planning ahead

I wonder if any brothers and sisters want to have an outing in East Coast Park on Dec 24. Haha... we can do cycling, jogging, kayaking, picnic, or prepare for our presentation on Sunday School day? Hehe... I guess this Project 0812 is a chance for me to learn, so that I can improve in my service to my Lord in the committee of Gospel Camp in June 2009. May my Lord gives us the burden to spread His words! Pray that Tung Lieng has a safe journey home to KB on Dec 19. Hehe... pray that God bless the KB church, have a wonderful time with God during their family camp in KK. Hehe...

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

House warming

Project 0812

This is the first item on the list that I want to thank God for. I have learnt a lot of precious lessons from this outreach event. Although I have to guard the house, my heart went along with all the brothers and sisters, and friends who are yet-a-Christians who have enjoyed themselves with the icebreaker games and the treasure hunt. Hehe... I am glad that God has marcy on these friends that they could join us for the day (though some left after some activities).

I thank God that I manage not to laugh during the play, haha... then I make the summary to link up all the activities for the day... I should have put the verses I want to read out on the slides, so that it'll be easier for the audience to read than to listen. Haha... anyway, after the event, it is like I can put down the bag that I have been carrying. Haha... for once my public holiday is not wasted. Haha...

Personal Testimony

Yea, it is so important to write my own personal testimony hehe... will write soon...

Work

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, 3 days left for the week and I need to write three "user controls"... so each for each day. Hehe... hopefully I can get them all done this week, so that next week I can spend time furnishing them, make them more user-friendly. Hehe... I have used one day to do an "user control" today... I realise how slow I am, but I just can't help it... just always think too much, hehe... think of the advantages and disadvantages of implementation. Haha...

That's all for now. I thank God for all things!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

December in Singapore

December in Singapore

This is the first time I am going to spend my December in Singapore. Previously I would have gone back home to KB for the month, spent time with my family. However, this year is different, I can get to go for my church's open day on Dec 25. Haha... (I have never been to my church's open day before) How glad I am to be a member of my Lord's home, because I have so many brothers and sisters to share every joy and sorrow we have. Hehe...

In one of the service, the speaker mentioned about two brothers (the elder one is a Christian, but the younger not). Once they went for travel around the world, and at every place they were going to spend the night, they always stay in a house of a "friend". Then the younger brother got curious and ask his big brother, "Hey bro, you have never told me that you have friends all over the world!". The elder brother replied, "These are not my friends, but my brothers and sisters in Christ." Haha... looks like this elder brother did some homework before he went travelling - contact the local churches' brothers and sisters before he went visit that place. Haha...

Work never ends

Nevertheless, speaking of my work, it is very challenging. Also, still learning to apply God's word in our life. Hehe. His word comforts my heart when I looked down on my schedule and felt tense that I have so many to-do in such a short time. Haha... once this week my boss and team leader came to my desk. The team leader jotted down my pending tasks, then my boss asked me when I expect to complete them. I looked at my pending tasks, ticked some of them and said that I could complete those I ticked by next week. The boss looked at me and told me that he expected by this week. Haha... see what did I tell you? Sure it is tense. Haha... anyway I told them that I will try my best (give myself some breathing space) but I don't want to overestimate myself, or else I won't be able to complete by next week as well (haha, then I can pack up and go le). The boss didn't say anything, just went away.

I have been working till 6.20pm++ for these few days, (today 6.55pm), trying to meet the expectation, but not sure if I can complete those I ticked tomorrow or not. Haha... thank God for the long weekends (next Monday is a public holiday, when we will have our outreach event - The Game of Life). I will continue to pray to my Lord for wisdom to complete my pending tasks in His time. Hehe... He knows me the best, and how much work I can handle. Hopefully I won't think too much when I am coding, as in, there are many ways to tackle a problem, and I tend to spend time thinking about their advantages and disadvantages, thus delaying my work. Haha...

Project 0812

Yes, next Monday is our outreach event. I thank God that He has prepared his own workers for His work. I have finally settled the three brothers and sisters to share their personal testimonies. Next, I have also chosen 3 sections in the video - The Case For the Creator, that should take approximately 30 minutes in total. Finally, I have written my sharing to link up all the activities with the gospel. Hopefully I can get it checked before Dec 8, haha... and need to practice before Dec 8.

Speaking of practicing on Sunday (Dec 7) night, I thought of the drama series TungNgie and I have been watching every weekends - Royal Tramp on Channel U. The drama series ended on Saturday (Dec 6) night. Thus I will have plenty time to practice on the night of Dec 7. Haha... God knows that I won't practice if the drama series had not ended. Haha... He sure knows us better than ourselves (He paid a great price for us). Haha... I thank my Lord God that He has opened my eyes to acknowledge myself as a sinner, willing to throw away any idols' in my heart, and let Him sit on the throne of my heart. Without Him, I don't dare to think what I will be.

Hopefully I can continue to spread the gospel to my dad, the only member in my family who has not believe in Christ. I will continue to pray that God will open his eyes one day, and he will be willing to acknowledge himself as a sinner, need Christ's blood to cleanse his heart. Thus, willing to accept Jesus Christ as his personal savior, be a member of God's children.

Tomorrow (Dec 5, Friday), we will practice for the skit for our outreach event. Hong Ling, Enn Yew and Tung Ngie have tough roles. I thank God that I can be a part of the skit too, and they assigned me an easy role... but I must force myself not to laugh. Haha... oopz... sorry... NG NG! The Great Exchange is the title of the skit. May the meaning of the story be clear to those who watch it, especially those who are not yet a Christian.

Haha... I learnt that phrase "those who are not yet a Christian" from Vincent, one of our brothers in church. He asked Tung Ngie whether all our family members are Christian or not. Then we told him that only my dad is not a Christian. He corrected us by saying that he is not yet a Christian. Haha... we must all have faith that God will work in His own time, we just have to keep sowing the seeds, the seeds will grow if God allows them to. Haha... most important thing is that we must not take God's word for granted. Hehe...

God blesses all His children and may His number of children increases every moment so that there are cheers and celebrations in the heaven!